I Get Your Point/Excuse Me Mr. Rhino, You Go First...

"Good times for a change,
See, the luck I've had,
Can make a good man turn bad..." (The Smiths, Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want)

KRUGER - DAY THREE

So we got up, had brekkie (breakfast), and went off into the Kruger hinterlands. We all realized that our hopes of seeing all The Big Five in the entirety (Elephant, Cape Buffalo, Leopard, Lion, Rhinoceros) on this trip was a longshot.

But did I travel 32,000 miles (or whatever the distance was) to give up? Hell no! So off we went; Abby, Candice, Rob, and myself, the token American (though the park didn't know that, they thought I was South African cos I stayed in the jeep when they went to pay the entrance fees, plus I would have feigned sleeping).

Elephants! Waterbucks! Giraffes! Monkeys! Sigh, the same thing, yet again...

...wait, what's that over there?

Why, could that be...a LEOPARD??? Hold on, Candice, I think it is!!!

Yes, I'm A Juvenile, What's It To You?

What is it doing? We don't care! We've seen a jaguar in the wild! Woo Hoo! But wait, what's that over there?

Why it's a mutant-sized porcupine!!! With what appears to be chunk missing from its tail!

La-La-La-La-La

...and now we know why!!!

Must...Have...Food

So what's happening in the photo below? Well, we figured out that the jaguar took the chunk out of the porcupine's tail, but the porcupine deposited some quills on the jaguar's face!!! This is what is known as "a wash".

"I'll Walk Away If You Walk Away..."

Here's proof to everyone the porcupine walked away:

Now we're fired up!

"Now I believe there comes a time,

where everything just falls in line,

we live and learn from our mistakes,

All fired up, fired up, fired up..." (Pat Benatar, All Fired Up)

The good vibes were aplenty in the jeep after seeing the jaguar.

"I'm picking up good vibrations..." (The Beach Boys, Good Vibrations)

Next we happened to come upon two Nyala facing off:

Our last day in Kruger has been a good day. Although we didn't get to see all of the big five (Mother Nature can be fickle), we did what we could, and headed South to Berg-en-Dahl, the southernmost gate in the park.

Then, it happened...

"...The waiting is the hardest part..." (Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers, The Waiting)

A CRASH OF RHINOS!!!

The following is a compilation of snippets of video of a crash (yes, a crash, like an exaltation of larks or a murder of crows or a pod of whales; see animal group terms) of rhinos that crossed our path right outside the camp. Rob was a bit on edge with giant creatures, especially since we were charged by the bull elephant back at Timbavati (see Bungle in the Jungle). Because of this, he kind of backed up as this buffoon in the jeep next to us kept revving his engine. 

The video is a little over 14 minutes long of spliced smaller videos.

At the end as the male (bull) rhino turns around and ponders whether to attack his car. Unfortunately, I didn't get it on video (shenanigans!) but Abby got some photos of him after he turned around, as you can see below:

You Talking To ME?

On our trip out to Kruger, we stopped by a shop and picked up some cigars (for Rob and myself, not the girls) for a celebratory smoke. It was quite nice out the last night, so we did a nice grill (sorry, braai) session. Below are some photos of the boys on our last night at Kruger, with the stogies and a bottle of port.

Stylin' And Profilin'!

It's Good To Be The King

More Deep Thoughts!!!

Oh, here's a photo of the house we stayed in:

Fond Memories Of This Place

As we were leaving the camp, I saw this sign I just had to take a photo of. Question: Why are children driving slowly? Why aren't they driving fast? Come to think of it, why are they driving at all? Can somebody explain this to me?

I Hope You're Not In A Rush!

After a long drive, we made it back to Jo'burg's outer suburbs to where Rob lives. 

"...There are times that you feel you're part of the scenery, all the greenery is comin' down boy..." (Supertramp, Take The Long Way Home)

And of course, we had to get one last photo of the "Fearless Foursome":

Candice, Rob, Abby, Steve

All in all, a fabulous time with some fabulous animals and sights and some fabulous people. Onwards to the next adventures in South Africa! Thank you Rob and Candice!!!

A Veritable Potpourri, A Cornucopia, A Smorgasbord Of Creatures, If You Will

"...all you zombies hide your faces,

all you people in the street..." (Hooters, All You Zombies)

OR

"What's in your head, your head,

Zombie

Zombie

Zombie-he-he..." (Cranberries, Zombie)

KRUGER - DAY TWO

After the resounding success we had in our Kruger - Day One wanderings, we decided we would get up super early and try and catch the  animals as they hung out at the watering holes (similar to office workers hanging by the water cooler, except the animals are naked and on all fours. Which would be the same if the office was a porno film shoot, but I digress).

The reason for this is the temperature the night of Kruger - Day One was ridiculously hot and steamy; I would guess 95F (35C) with no breeze. So logically we thought these temperatures and sunshine would continue.

OK, so that's the back story for Kruger - Day Two.

So we got up real early (mmm, sometime before 6am; wasn't this supposed to be a holiday?) and of we went to find our version of "Battle at Kruger".

But first, I saw this massive insect called a "Shongalolo". Basically, a giant centipede. Here it is, in action:

The problem was that the morning was cloudy and cool, so the animals were sleeping in because it wasn't hot temperature-wise. So we weren't finding anything, alas.

Until...

Stopping by a small lake, we saw some turtles. Then they saw us. Cute little guys (or girls, hard to tell when they're in the water. Yes, also hard to tell when they're out of the water also) . They decided to come swim towards us. We also saw a small crocodile in the lake just chilling out. The turtles came out of the water like they were being commanded...by the crocodile...to attack the jeep. Hence the song titles listed above. See the exciting, scary, ridiculous scenes below:

Well, after such an intense experience, what could top that? Now much, apparently. On further travails through Kruger, we spotted a Klipspringer. Really small, and freaky looking, as it looks like they have four eyes!

Either That's Four Eyes Or They Were All Shot Straight Through The Head

Oh, and who said zebras and giraffes don't get along?

Spots, Stripes, We're All The Same Inside

And it's not just the animals that are to behold. Even the tress and bushes are bizarre. Like this bush, that grows upside-down into the ground!

You Really Didn't Believe Me, Did You?

But there were other creatures in the park I have yet to mention. For example, there are many types of birds, including this guy, the Bateleur. Pretty impressive looking bird. Or so he thinks. A member of the eagle or buzzard family, Wikipedia can't decide.

Look At Me, I'm A Bateleur!

Now some of you might be saying "Gee Steve, certainly there has to be some ugly creatures bandying about the park"? You are correct my friends, there are. May I present to you, a top five finisher in "The World's Ugliest Creature" contest many years running...The Warthog:

"Wait, Get My Good Side"

But there are some beautiful creatures in the park. For example, us. Ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages, I present to you my cohorts on this amazing journey, Abby, Candice, and Robert!!!

Robert, Abby and Candice In Deep Thought And Reflection On Our Journey So Far

Well, that was Day Two of Kruger, Day Three, our last day, will take us to the southern most camp, Berg-en-Dal. Still hoping to see jaguars and rhinos. We shall see...