I Get Your Point/Excuse Me Mr. Rhino, You Go First...

"Good times for a change,
See, the luck I've had,
Can make a good man turn bad..." (The Smiths, Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want)

KRUGER - DAY THREE

So we got up, had brekkie (breakfast), and went off into the Kruger hinterlands. We all realized that our hopes of seeing all The Big Five in the entirety (Elephant, Cape Buffalo, Leopard, Lion, Rhinoceros) on this trip was a longshot.

But did I travel 32,000 miles (or whatever the distance was) to give up? Hell no! So off we went; Abby, Candice, Rob, and myself, the token American (though the park didn't know that, they thought I was South African cos I stayed in the jeep when they went to pay the entrance fees, plus I would have feigned sleeping).

Elephants! Waterbucks! Giraffes! Monkeys! Sigh, the same thing, yet again...

...wait, what's that over there?

Why, could that be...a LEOPARD??? Hold on, Candice, I think it is!!!

Yes, I'm A Juvenile, What's It To You?

What is it doing? We don't care! We've seen a jaguar in the wild! Woo Hoo! But wait, what's that over there?

Why it's a mutant-sized porcupine!!! With what appears to be chunk missing from its tail!

La-La-La-La-La

...and now we know why!!!

Must...Have...Food

So what's happening in the photo below? Well, we figured out that the jaguar took the chunk out of the porcupine's tail, but the porcupine deposited some quills on the jaguar's face!!! This is what is known as "a wash".

"I'll Walk Away If You Walk Away..."

Here's proof to everyone the porcupine walked away:

Now we're fired up!

"Now I believe there comes a time,

where everything just falls in line,

we live and learn from our mistakes,

All fired up, fired up, fired up..." (Pat Benatar, All Fired Up)

The good vibes were aplenty in the jeep after seeing the jaguar.

"I'm picking up good vibrations..." (The Beach Boys, Good Vibrations)

Next we happened to come upon two Nyala facing off:

Our last day in Kruger has been a good day. Although we didn't get to see all of the big five (Mother Nature can be fickle), we did what we could, and headed South to Berg-en-Dahl, the southernmost gate in the park.

Then, it happened...

"...The waiting is the hardest part..." (Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers, The Waiting)

A CRASH OF RHINOS!!!

The following is a compilation of snippets of video of a crash (yes, a crash, like an exaltation of larks or a murder of crows or a pod of whales; see animal group terms) of rhinos that crossed our path right outside the camp. Rob was a bit on edge with giant creatures, especially since we were charged by the bull elephant back at Timbavati (see Bungle in the Jungle). Because of this, he kind of backed up as this buffoon in the jeep next to us kept revving his engine. 

The video is a little over 14 minutes long of spliced smaller videos.

At the end as the male (bull) rhino turns around and ponders whether to attack his car. Unfortunately, I didn't get it on video (shenanigans!) but Abby got some photos of him after he turned around, as you can see below:

You Talking To ME?

On our trip out to Kruger, we stopped by a shop and picked up some cigars (for Rob and myself, not the girls) for a celebratory smoke. It was quite nice out the last night, so we did a nice grill (sorry, braai) session. Below are some photos of the boys on our last night at Kruger, with the stogies and a bottle of port.

Stylin' And Profilin'!

It's Good To Be The King

More Deep Thoughts!!!

Oh, here's a photo of the house we stayed in:

Fond Memories Of This Place

As we were leaving the camp, I saw this sign I just had to take a photo of. Question: Why are children driving slowly? Why aren't they driving fast? Come to think of it, why are they driving at all? Can somebody explain this to me?

I Hope You're Not In A Rush!

After a long drive, we made it back to Jo'burg's outer suburbs to where Rob lives. 

"...There are times that you feel you're part of the scenery, all the greenery is comin' down boy..." (Supertramp, Take The Long Way Home)

And of course, we had to get one last photo of the "Fearless Foursome":

Candice, Rob, Abby, Steve

All in all, a fabulous time with some fabulous animals and sights and some fabulous people. Onwards to the next adventures in South Africa! Thank you Rob and Candice!!!

A Veritable Potpourri, A Cornucopia, A Smorgasbord Of Creatures, If You Will

"...all you zombies hide your faces,

all you people in the street..." (Hooters, All You Zombies)

OR

"What's in your head, your head,

Zombie

Zombie

Zombie-he-he..." (Cranberries, Zombie)

KRUGER - DAY TWO

After the resounding success we had in our Kruger - Day One wanderings, we decided we would get up super early and try and catch the  animals as they hung out at the watering holes (similar to office workers hanging by the water cooler, except the animals are naked and on all fours. Which would be the same if the office was a porno film shoot, but I digress).

The reason for this is the temperature the night of Kruger - Day One was ridiculously hot and steamy; I would guess 95F (35C) with no breeze. So logically we thought these temperatures and sunshine would continue.

OK, so that's the back story for Kruger - Day Two.

So we got up real early (mmm, sometime before 6am; wasn't this supposed to be a holiday?) and of we went to find our version of "Battle at Kruger".

But first, I saw this massive insect called a "Shongalolo". Basically, a giant centipede. Here it is, in action:

The problem was that the morning was cloudy and cool, so the animals were sleeping in because it wasn't hot temperature-wise. So we weren't finding anything, alas.

Until...

Stopping by a small lake, we saw some turtles. Then they saw us. Cute little guys (or girls, hard to tell when they're in the water. Yes, also hard to tell when they're out of the water also) . They decided to come swim towards us. We also saw a small crocodile in the lake just chilling out. The turtles came out of the water like they were being commanded...by the crocodile...to attack the jeep. Hence the song titles listed above. See the exciting, scary, ridiculous scenes below:

Well, after such an intense experience, what could top that? Now much, apparently. On further travails through Kruger, we spotted a Klipspringer. Really small, and freaky looking, as it looks like they have four eyes!

Either That's Four Eyes Or They Were All Shot Straight Through The Head

Oh, and who said zebras and giraffes don't get along?

Spots, Stripes, We're All The Same Inside

And it's not just the animals that are to behold. Even the tress and bushes are bizarre. Like this bush, that grows upside-down into the ground!

You Really Didn't Believe Me, Did You?

But there were other creatures in the park I have yet to mention. For example, there are many types of birds, including this guy, the Bateleur. Pretty impressive looking bird. Or so he thinks. A member of the eagle or buzzard family, Wikipedia can't decide.

Look At Me, I'm A Bateleur!

Now some of you might be saying "Gee Steve, certainly there has to be some ugly creatures bandying about the park"? You are correct my friends, there are. May I present to you, a top five finisher in "The World's Ugliest Creature" contest many years running...The Warthog:

"Wait, Get My Good Side"

But there are some beautiful creatures in the park. For example, us. Ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages, I present to you my cohorts on this amazing journey, Abby, Candice, and Robert!!!

Robert, Abby and Candice In Deep Thought And Reflection On Our Journey So Far

Well, that was Day Two of Kruger, Day Three, our last day, will take us to the southern most camp, Berg-en-Dal. Still hoping to see jaguars and rhinos. We shall see...

Bungle In The Jungle (Part Deux) - Day One

"...Cause I want to live like animals,
Careless and free like animals" (Savage Garden, The Animal Song)

KRUGER - DAY ONE

Kruger Park is enormous; it is one of the biggest game parks (for viewing animals, not hunting them) in the world; it is approximately the size of Israel.

We entered at the Kruger Gate near the Southern tip and headed to our first night's camp, Olifants, located on the Olifants River (clever name, no?). It was brutally hot and humid, I think it said 35C (95F plus humidity).

The Orange Icons Are The Camps In The Park

First stop are the baboons. Nasty little buggers, but the babies are so darn cute:

It's A Hobbit!

Figure-Four Death Lock

Cruising along the main road, we saw a giraffe off to the side:

"Hello There, Stretch"

And a video of him!

Then off by a watering hole, we saw a huge number of elephants, just chilling out:

"Who Brought The Beer?"

Then we saw a couple of them either kissing each other, or probing each other for ticks:

Next we saw Cape Buffalo. These are big creatures, and although they look stupid, they are actually clever. If you try and kill one but don't succeed, it will lure you into the brush/forest, circle around, and attempt to kill you with the help of fellow herd members. They definitely work in groups; if you haven't seen the video of "The Battle at Kruger", you should check it out by clicking this link.

Here's a snippet of video of some Cape Buffalo. Can you spot the males?

While Abby and Candice were checking us in to the Olifants Camp, Rob and I mindlessly stared at the river. Suddenly we saw two hippos climb out of the water; the only time we saw them out of the water during the entire trip. Funny looking in the water, and out of the water.

And lastly, sunset over the Olifants River. Quite a successful Day One. Up early tomorrow to try and see the animals at the watering holes.

It's Good To Be The King

I Can See Clearly Now...

It's a beautiful day,
The Sun is shining,
I feel good and no one's going to stop me now... (Queen, It's A Beautiful Day)

On the road to Kruger! But before hitting Kruger, we were driving through some of the most impressive scenery I have ever seen (and "I've been everywhere, man..." (Johnny Cash, I've Been Everywhere)).

First stop was a series of hills (mountains?) called the Three Rondavels ("Three Houses"), which look very close to the houses built by members of the Xhosa tribe.

This Really Doesn't Do The Vista Any Justice

So Damn Excited, It's Time To Break An Ankle

Mickey Has An Interest in Abby...

Next, it was off to The Bourkes Luck Potholes. South Africa is the only country I've visited where they have actual highway and road signs warning of "Potholes next X km". I guess it takes them a long time to repair them (actually, it does take them a long time, and when they do fix them it's usually a half-ass job).

But these are nature-made potholes. Take a gander!

Kinda Like a Dali Painting

Very Similar To South Africa's Roads

Next it was off to "God's Window", which provided a view from the High Veld (Valley) area to the Low Veld. These views were amazing; when I stitch the photos together it will give a better idea of how amazing the view is.

Quite A Deserving Name (i.e. God's Window)

Continuation Of Above Photo

"...And On Your Left Side..."

Sunset As We Leave The Blyde River Canyon Area

Details On The Above Photos

The next day, we are in Kruger Park, on the lookout for animals from the safety of an enclosed vehicle. Getting stoked!!!

Bungle In The Jungle (Part One)

I was standing in the jungle, 
I was feeling alright,
Mmm Hmmm, Mmm Hmmm... (Electric Light Orchestra, Jungle)

Sorry it took so long to update, but we didn't have internet part of the time.

After seeing the dam, Apartheid Museum, etc. we took off from Jo'burg with Abby's childhood friend Rob and his girlfriend Candice and headed to Timbavati Game Reserve (see web site), where Abby's friend Wendy and her husband Grant have a Game Farm.

It took ten hours because we had some delays; some two-legged (we missed some turns) and some four-legged (we saw some eyes reflecting in the distance, and Wendy's son Michael said based on their color it's probably impala; except it was a small herd of elephants, with the baby on one side and the mom on the other. We decided to wait for them to meet up. Then we ran across a group of buffalo, who seemed to be afraid of the headlights. Oh, and a hyena).

The next morning, it was time for our first sojourn into the reserve (it actually connects to Kruger Park, it acts as a buffer for the western part of the park).

Our first spotting!

Hungry Hungry Hippos!

We then drove along, and saw various eagles, impalas, etc. then we ran across this guy :

I'm Bad, I'm Nationwide

A bull elephant in rut (in heat). They get quite temperamental during this time, and he was no exception. We were driving on the path, came around the bend, and he was right there. We were deathly silent waiting to see what he was going to do (I knew that WE were going to do, and that was change our underwear later when we got back to the camp). The following video I taped shows what happened (grab the popcorn, kiddies!)

Whew! But wait, there's more to the story...

Could anything top that? Possibly! About 15 minutes later we ran into these "deviants" chilling in the late morning sun...

"Oh Damn, It's Humans"

"Yup, definitely humans!"

Synchronized Ignoring

Next was the night drive, where you drive and can't see anything except in this case we were sober. We saw a mongoose and more impalas, and even saw a honey badger (but he didn't give a sh*t). We also saw this guy, wandering round on his own:

"Where Are All The Chicks?"

The next day, scuttlebutt around the camp was that a pride of lions had killed a buffalo, and they were having a Fancy Feast. So we made surreptitious plans to check it out. Success!!! (Note that shadows on bottom of photo are from the car window, plus Abby was taking the photos in rapid-fire fashion).

"Who Dares To Bother The King of the Jungle"?

Next is a snippet of video of his lordship (NOTE: it includes a bit of the carcass, might not be for the squeamish):

Well, that was pretty cool. We felt much safer being in a Land Rover that wasn't open.

Next, we knew there were rhinos about, because, well, they leave large piles of rhino poop (they are BIG animals). So our mission was to find the rhino without the poop. We drove around for several hour, when suddenly...

Those suckers move real fast for such hulking, lumbering dinosaur-like relics!!!

That ended our excitement at the Game Park, because the next day we were off to stay at a hotel near the Kruger Gate, at the South end of the park.

But before I sign off, a side note. When Grant & Wendy were leaving the Game Park with their kids Michael & Lauren (after we had already left), they ran into the same elephant you see above. Grant floored it in reverse faster than he ever has, because that pachyderm had a score to settle with us. Happy to report both people and car escaped unscathed.